Suppose you have a theme, for example stress. Of course, we will first look at whether it concerns a specific situation, but it can certainly also be general. That will be constellated as a theme. On the paper you will write: theme. You do not write on the paper: stress. Stress itself can mean that you don't get beyond the duality experience in it. Stress itself is there. You can start to feel how it feels. It can be uncomfortable or seem logical. But in itself, it is not a moving system. If you call it a theme, it is broader. Then something can come to the fore that can and wants to be helped. It may be that the use of a duality word in a constellation will not be a problem and that it will resolve itself, but that is not certain. You can also get stuck in it. That is why it is safer to use a general word. Then something that wants to be seen and healed can come to the fore in the place of the theme. But ultimately, what can happen will happen. Not every problem is ready to be solved. (See also the heading ‘What you don’t do’ under ‘Constellations in general’.)

In addition, ‘I’, which is you yourself, and your inner child are also placed in the constellation. I will then ask you to take three sheets of paper and write on one: theme, on another: I, and on the third: inner child. And I will ask you to draw an arrow on all three, a random arrow. Then I will ask you to place the three sheets on the floor without thinking about it.

After that, I will ask you to stand on the “I” paper and look in the direction of the arrow. Then you can start talking, slowly and calmly, about what you are experiencing and feeling, what comes to mind (what you want to say, of course). This takes time. Do it calmly and carefully. Check in with what you are physically and emotionally aware of.

Then questions such as the following are also important: which way are you looking? Can you see the paper with the inner child? Can you see the paper with the theme on it? Are they far away from you? Or very close? Everything counts.

Once you have worked this out sufficiently and you feel that no new things will come to the surface, I suggest you stand on the paper with your theme and do the same. Or perhaps I will ask you what you would like to do now. Maybe you don't want to stand on the theme at all and would rather go to your inner child. Perhaps you have already felt where you want to go at a certain point and have already taken that initiative. The rule is always: you stand with your face in the direction the arrow is pointing. You take your time and slowly consider what you are experiencing and what comes to mind. And so it continues. Back and forth from one piece of paper to the other, back again, on to the third piece of paper... And taking your time everywhere to really feel and reflect. Something will unfold. All kinds of things happen from those movements.

If at any point you feel the need to look in a different direction on the paper, then turn the paper with the arrow pointing in that direction and continue looking from there. I am here to ask you questions, to make suggestions, but above all to let you experience a lot for yourself.

I also like to ask: how old are you? Then you say whatever comes to mind. If you indicate a childhood or adolescent age, I will ask you to make a piece of paper with your mother and a piece of paper with your father, again with an arrow, and also place them randomly on the floor. If one or both are completely missing, you can make a piece of paper with another parent. For convenience, I will continue to refer to them as father and mother. You decide which piece of paper you want to stand on first: your father's or your mother's, but you will examine both. And from there, you will return to “I”, the theme, the inner child. If you want to pause for a moment, you will go to the piece of paper with 'I' on it.

In this way, patterns unfold and underlying energies become visible. It works. That is constellations.

Nowhere do you have to ask why you feel or experience something. Nowhere does the question need to be asked to tell more about it. No stories need to be told. It's about the experiences in the here and now of the constellation. This may include descriptions of events if they come to mind and you want to talk about them.

In such situations, I like to use stones. I place a stone on each piece of paper and pick up that stone when I start to tune in. But that is certainly not necessary.

I hope I have been able to give you an impression of how I work and what you can expect from a small constellation.

Of course, changes can always be made to the form of the constellations, because anything is possible and sometimes the three-part theme, 'I' and inner child is not the most suitable form of constellation.