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Thoughts, thinking and I
Thoughts
Thoughts are instruments of impressions.
Thoughts are also creative. Whatever you give your attention to, you are helping to create, even if it does not happen immediately.
Thoughts can also be very repetitive; this is, for example, a characteristic of worrying or fretting.
These are all three different energy layers that can manifest in thoughts. A thought can therefore have a high frequency and be of a high dimension, but it can also have a low frequency and be of a low vibration.
Thoughts you cannot escape are of a lower vibration. They give you the feeling that they are overwhelming you, that you cannot get rid of them. They have an addictive aspect to them. In Buddhist traditions, you’ll find a brief explanation of this. It is said that this is because you identify with them. That’s an interesting observation from a meditative perspective. You might think: “Yes, of course you identify with them; otherwise, it wouldn’t be a problem in the first place.” “I’ve burnt myself”: “Oh no, that’s not me. That’s just an identification…” Wouldn’t it be lovely if it could be like that? Then we’d be zapping away from reality all the time into a little cloud of happiness and the rest would be gone.
That is a line of thinking that sometimes occurs among people who meditate and delve a little into Eastern practices. They ‘think’ a part of their lives. That is not possible. They look at their thinking and say: “That is just a thought.” That is not what I mean.
The brief explanation found in Buddhist (and indeed other) traditions as to why thoughts can have such an addictive or overpowering effect is interesting. As mentioned, that explanation was: because you identify with them. And here we arrive at a delicate balance where you are spiritually challenged to put this into proper perspective. If you lean too far one way, you get stuck. If you lean too far the other way, you dismiss it as worthless. The latter is actually better than getting bogged down in all sorts of convoluted thoughts. So if you notice that happening, just chuck the rubbish into the dustbin of your existence. It’s not important.
But as long as you don’t get stuck in your thoughts, you can carry on reading.
It’s not about saying anything about all those thoughts, but about ‘I’. ‘I’ is the precious treasure. ‘I’ is the world it’s all about. Who am I? That is the title of a little book by the Eastern mystic from the early 20th century, Sri Ramana Maharshi. ‘I’, my guides have told me, I must pronounce differently, namely ‘Étsja’. This word begins with a hard ‘e’, as in ‘Egypt’ (not as in ‘here’). The stress is on the first syllable. The ‘tsj’ is also pronounced hard, so with a clear ‘ts’ in it, followed quickly by a ‘j’ sound. The final ‘a’ does have a clear ‘a’ sound but is not long. Not the ‘a’ of ‘April’ but the ‘a’ of the first 'a' in the word ‘America’. Étsja.
Étsja’s power is as vast as the universe. You don’t have to believe that straight away; it’s probably a bit of a leap. But then I think you’ll immediately understand why the Buddhist tradition so often talks about self-identification, where the message is: ‘No, that’s not you at all. You only think that’s who you are.’
Because deep within us, a completely different being is hiding; that is why it is said. At least now you understand what is meant by that. But if we start telling each other: "you’re identifying yourself with a problem again" – you have money worries, problems at work, you’re lonely, your child is ill or perhaps you yourself are ill, someone in your family… and so on – if we start telling each other, when you’re worrying about this again, that you’re identifying yourself with a ‘not-real-me’ which isn’t necessary, then we’ll all end up in a spiritual fog together. Of course you’ll worry about that and start fretting! Reality is reality, not a thought and not an image either.
Self-awareness and having problems
Higher entities say, for example, that fear doesn’t exist; they even say that we humans don’t exist, but merely think we do. Yet they do go out of their way to help me with all my little problems and tell me I’m welcome to come to them with the same problem a thousand times over. So they open a few doors, see if a fresh breeze blows into the house of my consciousness from there, and then simply accept that that house is what it is.
The reason this is so important is not because people with heightened consciousness do indeed deal differently with the sort of matters that everyone else would worry about. But you cannot grow properly if you do not fully embrace your current self. So it is true that you will read: “do not worry so much about earthly and worldly matters because they are not worth it”. That is absolutely true. It is also absolutely true that when you find yourself in your higher state of consciousness, you do indeed have far fewer, if any, such worries.
But be careful with the idea that your ‘self’ is actually too great and too beautiful to be preoccupied with such matters here and now. You are here on Earth and you have chosen these circumstances. They form your lesson, your learning material. Do not pretend that it is not so important, or that they are not so real, or that life is actually just a little play. Your feelings are real, your thoughts are real, your emotions are real. You cannot simply dismiss them. Because if you start doing that, it will ultimately cost you your joy and pleasure in life. For then you will no longer be properly grounded in reality, in the Earth. Then you will gradually become less grounded. That ultimately makes life harder, not easier.
I’m not saying you should keep worrying like this all the time, but that, as long as you have these worries, you shouldn’t start ‘thinking’ of them as less real, because that won’t raise your level of consciousness.
You go through it. You don’t step over it. You don’t put it to one side. But through it. You take every little cell seriously, every little fear, every little thought. You let them be, give them a place, you care for them. You give them love and attention.
Then, if you happen to hear or it pops into your mind again: “you don’t need to identify with it so much”, there’s a chance you’ll sense what’s meant by it and perhaps think: “oh yes, that’s a good one”. But that will come from within, from your own feeling. Not from thinking about it. And then it’s right and fits that moment. At another time, it might be different again.
Stay true to your own feelings. Are you worried? Are you sad? Yes means yes. See what you need. What might comfort you? How can you find some sense of trust? Facing reality is an important tool in this, not thinking that it’s not so bad or “it’s just a thought” or “it’s just an image” when it is or was a real experience.
Being human is a very vulnerable affair, still. That will change one day, but that is the situation right now, and it evokes fear in many people.
If, in your situation, you feel the need to start meditating, that is wonderful; it means your inner self is knocking at your door and asking to be let in. You don’t always have the time or space for it, but how lovely that you have a guest coming to help you. Because that is how you can see it.
Soul and spirit
Some place the soul at the level of the accumulation of experiences across many incarnations. Then the word spirit is placed above that, as the spark of light that is eternal and remains at the core of its existence. Some use these words in exactly the opposite way, as I do. I learnt this from my guide Ramamura. He uses the word spirit as derived from spiritual. Spiritual is pretty much everything on the other side. Soul is truly of the much higher dimensions of existence. But in Dutch, these words are often used in reverse: body, soul and spirit. Soul is the part that incorporates the experiences of lives, that can be damaged, that learns and grows. Spirit is the Great Spirit, akin to the Holy Spirit.
It depends on the text to see how these words are used. Furthermore, the same applies here as with the words universe, galaxy, cosmos. What scale are we talking about? Some regard one term as larger than the other. Some regard certain terms as being of the same scale. It is usually: large, larger and largest. But the question is: how large is meant, how much larger, and exactly how large is ‘largest’?
Higher forms of consciousness
At a certain point, individuality ceases to exist. Many individualities from one level can merge into an individuality of a higher level. But at that higher level, individuality does exist once again. At a certain point, there is no longer any individuality. This is not only at the very highest level; it occurs even before that. There, consciousness is always ‘we’, a group; there are forms of consciousness that are conscious together and are aware of being part of an even greater consciousness. Just think of your own body, the various parts of the body, which can in turn be subdivided into smaller parts, and this can go on for quite some time. That vast consciousness is not aware of those very small parts. It is aware of their existence from a certain level, but not of what that existence is like, how it takes shape, or how it experiences itself.
Christina von Dreien speaks beautifully about this when people ask: "I am me, of course, but what then is my soul?" She always explains that you yourself are your soul. But that your own consciousness has dimensions that are not conscious in your everyday awareness. Yet you are not separate from your soul. Your soul—which is who you are—is partly incarnated and partly not incarnated. A part of your soul always remains in the source, and only when you are reunited with your own source are you who you truly are. And that ‘story’ continues too…
Teachers of Emptiness
The divine is all that is. That is how it is usually explained. My spiritual guides explain it differently. They do not speak of the divine. Everything is energy. And it is nothing else. Energy is thus a word for a kind of ‘substance’ and means: created. A created reality. But what is in itself, uncreated, is not energy. What is goes beyond that. Energy is something that is not real, that is temporary, dependent on what is real, and that of itself can do nothing, has no power. The power that alone can be called power is the power of the void. The void gives all being—and thus all energy—everything that is, existence and the power to be and to move. But in itself, energy is nothing.
Transformation of whatever kind always comes from the void. The void itself is not energy. Energy is a created thing that is not in itself and cannot do anything, but which is existence for us and everything around us. If something is not energy, we do not know it and it cannot be known, for then it does not ‘exist’. Energies can only perceive energies. The void cannot be perceived. My teachers are teachers of the void. That is different from other energies. That is why they also reach different conclusions.
The void does not work indirectly. The void works directly. You are not connected to the void via ever-higher energies, somewhere far away or very deep or very high or wherever. You are now directly from the void; every cell, every atom, every little thought, your glance, the movement of your hands, everything about you, is from the void. To the void, you are the body. The eyes through which it looks. The hands with which it can feel, grasp, be there for another; your words are the words through which the void speaks. Your body and your personality are perfectly created and wait patiently for you to grasp that. There is nothing wrong with anything. Everything is fine.
The breath is being. That pulsating movement of creation. And then everything came into motion….